How low can you go?

Discussion in 'Your Religion & Spiritual Corner' started by pardonme, Oct 12, 2006.

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  1. pardonme

    pardonme Guest

  2. gardenfish

    gardenfish New Member

    all those years ago when I was a psychotherapist I had a patient who was a shame based person. Physically she was beautiful, gorgeous, but she thought she was ugly and she struggled constantly to maintain any sense of worth. She was a cutter. She slashed her arms so that the physical pain and the bleeding would prove to her that she was a human and because she felt the pain and saw the blood she was normal in at least that aspect. Everyone feels pain and bleeds when cut. During an awful time (what adjectives fit this kind of low?) I asked her to trust me. We had our boundaries established. I took her hand in mine and I led her into the bathroom. I kept the door open of course. There I turned on the warm water, rolled up her sleeves, took a soft and clean white cloth and bathed her terrible scars and wounds. It was as if a lifetime of evil and anguish, suffering and self-revulsion were washed away. She cried and even now I get teary thinking about this and the gift she gave me. To be a part of someone's healing is to be blessed. We took in each other's eyes and I anchored the moment in her body with a safe touch, I think on the top of a shoulder if I recall correctly. This was no cure, but I told her that anytime she could safely close her eyes and be washed again and be safely loved. In the months that followed she became on of an intern on my staff . There she helped others who came in despair and desperation, in pain and shame. In helping one is helped, in service one gains a sense of self. There are many true stories such as this one, a great many. When I am low I can tap into them. They do not need to be my stories but I can use them and think about them and give them their due. Then I can go out and face the world even if that only means that I fold laundry and vacuum the floor of dog hair. Low is low for sure, but normal is there too. We just need to allow that, whether or not we feel worthy of it, the healing is there as well.
    Paul
    Paul
     
  3. charisse

    charisse Been hanging here for 8 years

    Pardonme,

    I think so many people try and hide those times, hence we don't know about them and assume their lives are better than ours. I've been at an 8 a number of times. I had great shame, but once I found out others lives are pretty much like mine, I gave the shame up. Hey just live with someone and you find real quick how we put our best foot forward in front of others. I am very honest about my stuff, some use to say to honest.

    I think too it doesn't help that others have passed judgment on us in the past, keeps that shame going.
     
  4. Titus

    Titus New Member

    10

    Choose life.....
    Rights of the unborn......
    Protect God's children......

    ...........and then I had an abortion

    Nobody knows what they'll do when they are faced with fear.

    Lesson learned: Forgive everyone and judge no one
     
  5. charisse

    charisse Been hanging here for 8 years

    After reading Kim's I must change my 8 to a 10. Your so right, even we don't know how we will react to a situation, good or bad.
     
  6. NurseMom

    NurseMom New Member

    10 for me also, for other reasons....

    Kim and Charisse, YOU two are honestly two of the most inspiring, honest and non-judgemental people that truly help others in the way you present yourselves.

    I can't stand people who are so quick to judge, no one can truly know what it feels like to be in any situation unless they are wearing your shoes.

    You both are assets to humanity and represent Christianity for what it should be. For that- I say thank you!
     
  7. gardenfish

    gardenfish New Member

    I forgot to use the scale. An 8 sounds right and I say that only because I believe that there could be a lwoer point or two but I have not gone their yet or else I somehow caught myself.
     
  8. charisse

    charisse Been hanging here for 8 years

    Di,

    Thankyou so much. You have always encouraged me in my honesty, such a difference to the times I was told to keep it to myself :-*
     
  9. Linda1002

    Linda1002 New Member

    Kim - You have influenced me to pull out something I wrote in 1992 for a college speech class assignment. I know you will understand.

    Have you determined your position or belief on controversial issues like divorce, abortion and euthanasia?

    Are you so convinced of your position that you'll never change your belief?

    Twenty years ago I would have answered "yes" to these questions.

    I did not believe in divorce until I could no longer endure, or let my children endure, the emotional trauma that comes with marriage to a compulsive gambler and verbal abuser.

    I did not believe in abortion until my daughter was faced with the decision.

    I did not believe in euthanasia until I had to make the decision at my father's deathbed, and again at my mother's deathbed.

    I challenge you to be peacefully convicted to your beliefs while maintaining an understanding tolerance for the right of the other person to believe differently.

    And never say never!

    Some day you might be standing in the other person's shoes.
     
  10. Titus

    Titus New Member

    (((((Linda))))) That speech took courage and honesty.
     
  11. ToniG

    ToniG Guest

    Nicely written Linda.

    I'll have to go with an 8 when I was in my teens.
     
  12. Aladdin

    Aladdin Guest

    10 plus

    but then I was lifted by prayers and friends (not to mention a poem and text or two)
     
  13. pardonme

    pardonme Guest

  14. sparksmith

    sparksmith New Member

    Thank you Linda, for a glimse into what makes you the person you are today.

    I may be too late, but I'll post just the same. I, like Paul (gardenfish), believe there is a chance I could go lower. At a time when you just don't know yourself. As for the present I have fallen to a 10. I post a great deal about God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. I know I am completely unworthy of the gift. Even now with my understanding and knowledge of the greatest forgiveness, I have trouble forgiving myself. These are the times that I go to the foot of the cross. I plead my savior that I may again be forgiven. He assures me I am covered by the blood. At times I fear I will be disqualified from my testimony because I know I will fall but I Preach Jesus not myself. Eternal forgiveness is there, take it! Then pass on what has freely been given you.

    I often have felt if people knew all about me they would never listen to what I say.

    God Bless,
    Mike
     
  15. Linda1002

    Linda1002 New Member

    I've met you, Mike. What's in the past doesn't matter. When the Lord forgives, he forgets.
     
  16. cowcollector

    cowcollector Don't hug a tree, hug a cow!!

    Mike,
    we havent got to meet in person but i agree with Linda. our biggest probem is forgetting
    our past. bless you
     
  17. pardonme

    pardonme Guest

  18. Titus

    Titus New Member

    As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us. Psalm 103.12

    Mike, I've felt the same way you do, "if they knew me, my testimony would seem invalid". But you answered: It is the testimony of the risen King of Kings that we speak of. None of it is about us, it's all about Him. How can I ever be ashamed of the Gospel of the God of the universe who chose to come to this filthy world and hang from a tree in complete payment of my sins? So, after reflection, the question "how low can I go" seems meaningless in comparison to how a perfect, sinless God made man could become my sin, take my punishment and yours, for one reason: He loved us.
     
  19. charisse

    charisse Been hanging here for 8 years

    Mike,

    I was just talking to a good friend about this today. What a trap satan keeps us in when he whispers the lies that we are not good enough. The easy solution to this lie is to see ourselves as God does warts and all and he still loves us.
     
  20. lil_dip

    lil_dip New Member

    10++ But I have to be honest with you, if I did not have that part of my life, the part full of sin & disease (addiction) I would not know what true freedom is today.

    I got to walk through hell on earth to have a slice of heaven here on earth, and to know that I will be spending my eternity with my heavenly Father. I would not change any of it. I have been blessed to be able to share w/ other women "what happened, what it was like and what it is like now" and there is no greater joy than watching another human being find God!

    Peace~
    Laura
     

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