Stunned husband.

Could someone enlighten me as to what this is all about???? What exactly is Lee's husband upset about???

I am lost.....PM me if you don't want to add to this thread.

Thanks,
Laura

 

I ordered your book and can't wait for it to arrive. I support you Lee and hope you stay here for a very long time. For the record I have absolutely no problem with Darrel's post.

 

Darrel has many years of investment in the book as well. I understand the passion that is born from so much hard work and dedication. Based on that I have no problem with his "outburst". I have the book and hopefully it will be of benefit to me and my wife as well. For me that is the bottom line, "outburst" or not. I trust Lee.

 

Gardenfish, I feel as you. I've known Lee for many years now. I agree her husband's post was more about his passion because he has taken the journey with his wife. I know how he feels because of my own passions to different things, I have been looked at with a questioning eye on motives when really I was trying to do a good thing. My delivery may have sounded different from what i was trying to get across, but i think this happens to us all.

 

Darrell, it's sweet you sticking up for your wife, but when we ladies get out in the business world we have to take the heat that comes with it - and then the glory Respect your potential customers who have been around the block and been sold a bill of goods a few times. Faith and patience will bear fruit.

 

Now, hate me all you want, but the quote above is nothing more than a person pulling on the heart-strings and emotions of people who are suffering in an attempt to sell more of a product, which in this case, is a book.

The frustrating thing about all of this is that I like Lee and agree with many of the things she has preached on here for a while now. That being said, I simply cannot accept the "sudden" act by her husband by shrugging it off as some random act of frustration and/or care for those who are suffering. I have worked in Human Resources for many years now and a big part of my job is to read people. My suspicions are usually right.

As many have said on here, meniere's (and other vestibular disorders, for that matter) affect people differently. To have a non-sufferer criticize people for not reading a book which has but one of many potential "answers" to meniere's is unacceptable.

 

The road to hell is paved with good intentions. Cliche, eh? No one likes being told what to take, what to read, what to do, how to behave, how to conduct their life. The problem here is with the nature of the beast: internet forums (fora?) are notorious for being a platform for peddlers, preachers, scammers, do-gooders and other assorted know-it-alls and busybodies. That's why I personally approach ANY post of this nature with the utmost of suspicion. This is not to cast aspersions on Lee or Darrell. This is how I read every post that even as much as hints at advertising anything. I don't care how good it is for me. Now - it's a totally different story (such as Hank's case) for someone to come on and tell us in detail about a widely available product or procedure and how it has helped them. The level of suspicion there is definitely lower - though not non-existent.

Bottom line - thanks but no thanks. I appreciate that a lot of work has gone into this product/book/medication but I will decide what I need and want when I'm good and ready. It won't be through an internet forum plea, that's for sure.

George

 

Well said George.

 

just wanted to say i little from the point of view of a newbie, apologies if i speak out of turn, some of these threads suggest that members have been on here for a few years and know lee well, i've only been on here a few weeks and i'm very confused and hands up i admit very very scared sometimes about is happening to me, its daunting these first few months and probably years and these is no vast personal experience to fall back on, thats why this forum is so important to me, its been a guiding light in a very dark place of late.
we are not all fortunate enough to have friends and family close at hand to help us through the adapting required when embarking on a new treatment or regime, and we have to relie on what we are being told and find out what info suits the particular quirks or menieres particular to that person, i'm still working mine out. i am duty bound to follow orders and courses of treatment because of my job and as i am sure others are restricted in their own way.
advice is voluntary not compulsary, we alll need a helping hand but the also the freedom to use it in the way we need it.

 

Telly - I've been here a long time and I agree with you. I've been saying it all along, when you work fulltime it's sooooooo hard to work at getting well. I've had a few good remissions, symptom free might I add. I have some rough months behind me and seem to be coming out of the woods when I thought I was doomed this time. Hang in there, keep reading the forum and do what you can at your pace. A lot of good info to be had here.

 

ditto

 

believe me i exhausted many avenues of treatment before the dremmel hit my head for SCDS; there is no cure all for a true definition of MM. But a lot of relief and less 'stress' and other healing avenues can be found in books such as lee's. i am in tears as I read this thread again...i honestly wish there was a cure all for vertigo and other disorders if so than people such as myself wouldn't have to revert to drastic measures just to walk or hold their heads up...don't shame us...support us and as lee did help educate other types of reliefs and treatments - my surgeon described MM as a disease in which no known cure has been found - having said that he told me to do anything and everything I could to help relief the symptoms and God awful disheartening days...I am a relatively sane and educated woman and if there was a 'cure' for this I would never have had a drill to my temporal lobe...it's hard enough to be sane when you're spinning....we aren't all the same or do we all have the same body chemistry - what helps one may harm another - but words of encouragment and support will never harm us...

 

I chose to believe this post came from a good place, with that said I think there is enough written here to drive the point home that Lee's husband should have talked to her first. I respect Lee and would not like to see her hurt with the over and over comments that he did the wrong thing.

 

OK, let me try to explain.

I have always felt I owe this forum plenty. Without it, I would never have re-found my health, which in turn helped my whole family. So, right or wrong, I felt indedted to give back a little of what I gained. Rather than head back to teaching (a job I love), it was Darrell who suggested that I should write this all down, while he makes sure the bills are paid. We set a time frame, and that's what we (not just me) did. But once this was done, to Darrell's way of thinking this debt was paid in full. So when he saw me remaining on this forum (and not just socially, but still trying to help) we talked about it. I explained to him that I felt it hard to 'let go' of that desire to help, even though I knew I had already done all I could (perhaps you would call it a character flaw of mine). Because he knew I needed this, he literally 'burnt my bridges' for me with that post. That's why when I first read it (and said 'Oh ohhhhh') I didn't delete it. Believe me, I was tempted.

I think some people think I'm only on about meniere's sufferers. I'm not. I was a fibromyalgia sufferer, an asthmatic, had mild scoliosis, had chronic fatigue, had saw joints, ulcers and when very ill, depression. So my message of how much is possible - just by doing the 'basics' - applies to absolutely every sufferer on this planet. I also think age is irrelevant. I tell you, if someone in my family is sufferering at 90 years of age, I'd still be encouraging them to get the most out of this one solitary life we have. It takes all sorts of people, and that's just what I am like.

Those of you who are annoyed by what Darrell said would more than likely really like him if you met him. He's was/is a brickie by trade ... a good hearted, hard working, uncomplicated Aussie guy. And like a lot of partners, he can plonk his big foot in it with the best of them! But I tell you, his intentions are always good.

And finally, it doesn't really matter much the 'theory' of something, it's what we DO about it. The reality. And the reality is, now that it's all available, I don't need to be here. Finding our own health is a personal 'discovery', not something someone should direct/dictate.

So, a hug to my big, complex cyber family. And as hard as it will be not to read this thread anymore, I know I'm good at doing something once I know that's what has to be done. It's just like moving out of home, I'll pop in from time to time, but it's time for me to move on.

Lee.

 

I sometimes feel like I'm on a roller-coaster ride that I'd like to get off. Often I'm riding blind-folded so the up and down and side to side really catches me by surprise, makes me feel quite sick.
In truth, I use the roller-coaster metaphorically for the emotional ride this disease has put me through. I was warned about it when first diagnosed, "you'll go through denial, sadness, anger, depression, acceptance, etc, etc, and probably more than once."
But I thought, 'Nah, that's not me; I control what goes on in my head, how I process information, compartmentalise, put aside when needed and carry on. I'll manage it. I'll get through. I'll recover. I'll be fine'. I was so wrong.

Frustration is one I left out. And all of those emotions were not just what I felt. My wife, my kids see me and, yes they support me but, go through most of those emotions as well. And that just makes it harder for me. I'm the big strong man of the house; not a useless, bed-ridden suffering bag of bones who cringes at a bit of loud noise. Yeah right.

Maybe it would have been easier for me just to accept the warning early - maybe could then have started earlier on dealing with (getting help dealing with) all of the side-effects of those emotions. Sure don't think putting that off so long helped my cause. Hindsight is such a wonderful thing. (Oh to harness that - Wow - now that'd be a best-seller ;D)

Pretty sure I've seen the full range of emotions come through on this forum. This seems a fairly logical consequence... Pretty sure that will continue. So back to the psycho-babble; how should we react to someone who gets on here and sounds sad? Or depressed? Should we try and cheer them up, or poke 'em in the eye? How about if they're frustrated? Or angry?

I think one thing I still do is compartmentalise emotion. Not necessarily a good thing. It often becomes a habit and takes a lot of the joy out of life. End up thinking 'What's the point?' (My psych warns me this is not a good path)

Having said that, I still find it a valuable tool when writing emails. Writing when frustrated or angry makes it come out all wrong and so open to mis-interpretation. On this site though, I think it is OK. This is where we come to share our emotions openly, with people who understand what we're going through. I am so glad I've found it. It has helped me and my family has benefited from this as well.

Darrell, I can understand your frustration. I also understand a lot of the reactions here because your message did come across a bit mixed. I don't want to say anymore on that though - seems there's plenty said already to cover it all and teach each of us something.

To those suspicious of intent, would like to say about the book: it is truly genuine; simple to understand, logical - all the bits of common sense we should already know glued together. Not aimed at Meniere's sufferers specifically - everyone would benefit, including the fit and healthy. What Lee has done sure has inspired me and the Body Logic approach is making a difference.

Darrell, what you have done has inspired me also. You were a brickie? I was too for a while years ago, and reckon I've carried damage for 20 years since. Well, working on that from an all-over perspective but some of those trigger points seemed to have turned to stone! Anyway, have been thinking about the change in career you made, helping people the way you do. (Sorry, only going by the details in the book, which I read a while ago, and now can't find again, so can't remember all of the detail, so filling in the blanks of my memory myself.) Anyway, have been seriously thinking about how perhaps I could do something similar - particularly since a major career change might be forced on me in the near future..

Ahh, my posts are too long: since starting Lee comes on and confirms Darrell is a brickie so I got that right

 

~

 

Gees guys, I know we can do better than this.

 

With all due respect, I don't think it is fair to make such generalizations. Your statements make it sound like the entire membership are a bunch of ungraetful idiots because a few posters have questioned the motives of this thread.

There are lots of posters on this board who are looking for answers and seeking wellness. I am aiming for recovery, I am not stupid. In the past few days I have received two PMs from caring individuals who are trying to help me achieve wellness. I wasn't insulted. I was very touched that they cared enough to try and help me.

I don't come to this board very often, I don't have the time that a lot of you seem to have to spend here. I don't know the history behind this thread, but I think it is unfair to tar all of us with the same brush.

 

I am so glad that Lee is feeling so good, and that she is sharing what she found to help others. I am not very aware of it all, I was lucky to have a labrynthectomy in August and also feel healed, and very lucky. I don't agree, Pardonme, that "the more surgeries you endure the greater your value as a health advisor, OR, that this is a place where "aiming for recovery is treated like a stupid idea." I don't see anywhere that this has been suggested. If it has I missed something. It is rather amazing to even think that that is possible here, or that something like that could be written about our forum. I think everyone here does his/her best every day, and I think to say otherwise is to belittle us all. If Lee wants to move on that is certainly her option. I myself feel healed and don't feel that I have outgrown the forum, I have friends here, but that is neither here nor there, I understand that people stay or move on, we are all different. Do you really think that "people don't look to wellness for inspiration?" That befuddles me. Personally I think that there are a lot of knowledgeable people here who have suffered a lot, and just try to boost their friends up, and share ideas, and help each other. That's all. Nothing more complicated. And along the way, many HAVE found relief, in MANY ways, and if I ever (and I think I have) helped anyone in even a minor way, I feel so happy, because it feels good to help others. Lee is one among many, many people here who have helped others. Kudos to her and all of us for reaching out to try to help each other. Lisa

 

I do not understand the reason for the original post either. At all. It's all kind of sad isn't it? Not very grown up I would say.