I have had enough I WANT TO GO TO HEAVEN

I neglected to thank everyone who was in chat last night - Andrea, DizzyDon, Joy, Libby, Jabber, heavyduty (who just had shunt revision surgery and is doing so well), PDA, peggoins, tucker/danny.......sorry if I'm forgetting someone....but thanks to all of you (and those who tried to get there)!

Thanks also to Ruth - you are a sweetie.

Alisa - I hope today is a better day. We really do care!

 

I cant even begin to describe the feeling have today to everyone that reached out through their computer last night for me.. I am crying as I write this but you really all did save me from doing something stupid once again. I just get so hopeless and get into such a dark place I cant get out of it.. I wish I could see you all today!! I know thats crazy!! But I could feel all your concerns and help through the computer.. I hope one day we can all meet. Thank you everyone , Thank you Danny, Andrea, Don, gosh there were so many people caring for me and praying for me... and I feel still are.. I feel are blessed to have you all to talk to it my darkest moments. And PDA I am going to get in touch with him, had no idea he was a Pastor. I am going to try to call Ruth she lives 45 min a way from me.. just to talk to someone on the phone that understands how i feel is going to be such a help to me.Thank you everyone from the bottom of my heart and thank you so much for the beautiful poem that was so me last night. Thank you Linda. I am going to try really hard to have a good day today. I am actually haveing 10 women over to watch the WOmen of Faith 2007 DVD. So it should be uplifting and refreshing. I will be in touch daily with you all. I love you, its weird I know but I can feel hugs through the computer.. and I am giving you one all NOW!! It is just hard though cause you just dont know from day to day maybe even hour to hour or min to min what can happen with this stupid disease. But I am out of the pit from last night and I hope I wont be visiting it again soon. Love you all.

Love Alisa :'( :'(

 

Hi Alisa...good to hear you are feeling better. Women of Faith 2007 DVD.....what a great idea!! I used to love going to the conferances with girlfriends, but i haven't since MM....crowds, noise and traveling too difficult now....but I'm going to look into DVDs. Thanks for the idea!!!

Love Julie :'(

 

what are friends for, if you count on them when you need them.......Alisa thank you for posting today, you sound like you are in a better place, don't be afraid to reach out for anything, we all have our specialities and when we work together we can and do accomplish a lot.

Hugs Danny

 

(((Alisa)))

 

Every one here are so amazing, that's why I wanted to join this site! I've been were you are Alisa. I hope you are doing better today! It's so great to have friends who really do understand what you are going through and are here to help. A couple months ago, I too, wanted to die! In fact, I was driving when an attack hit me, I was close to home and called my husband at work for help. I told him then that I didn't want to live any more if this is the kind of life I have to live. But things are much better for me now. I am on Lexapro to help me at this time. So far, so good! I walk everyday now and try not to worry about what I cant change! Please hang in there with the rest of us! You will see the sun shine again!

 

I am so glad that you are ok! We were all concerned and praying.

 

Just sighned on here and havn't been here since yesterday and can't believe the 5 pages over night.
Everybody here did a great job it sounds like and I am so glad to hear that you are better today.We
all know and feel what you are going through.I have been horrible for the past 4 months and it gets
very depressing.I had the vns surgery and got 5 great years from it and now it is back.But,you know
what,I know alot of people here are against the surgery route but I will do it again to get another 5
years out of it.When we are this bad then why not try what ever it takes to get better.So many people
have gotten posotive relief from surgeries.Yes,some have not but I am willing to try ANYTHING it takes
to try and be better.
Wish you happy days and please keep in touch here.

 

Great to hear from you Alisa - big hugs to you!

 

What a great bunch of people here.I am proud to be a member of menieres.org!

 

Ditto!!
You sound much better! I'm so glad for you!!

 

Alisa ~ I am sorry I wasn't here for you, I was dealing with my own crisis, while you were having yours. We have such a great group of people here don't we? I understand the pain and wanting to end the pain but not the life that holds the pain, there's a difference there.

Glad to hear you are feeling much better.

Sparrow

 

Dear Alisa,

Im 52 years old, my husband has no partner, my daughter has no mother. I read what you wrote and it could be me. I so know what you mean. Everyday in my head I say "Im just waiting to die". What you wrote helped me today. I am not alone. I feel guilty for thinking what I think. I rage against this disease, but it's not cancer, its not so many things. Thank you for your words. I could have it a lot worse, but sometimes, some days I just want to die. Thanks for helping me not feel so alone.

summersglo

 

Alisa, I was also late getting here to read of your bad night in the pit! I am so thankful that you are doing better today. I will have to check out the Women of Faith DVDs too. I also miss being able to attend those conferences. So, you have been a help to two of us here already today in making that suggestion and also I see that summersglo has been affected by your post.

That is why we are here and keep coming here. We need each other. We need you too!

Summersglo, do not give up. You are not alone!

 

Way to go, Alisa! You made it through a pretty bad one. Now you know you can do it. I hope you have a beautiful day. I'm proud of you for being so tough - that's just what it takes sometimes.

Summersglo - welcome to the site. I would suggest starting a new thread so we can learn who you are and what your story is.

Bob

 

Alisa, I am so glad you are alright...I prayed all night for you.
Please know you are not alone and we are all here for you when you need us.
I have been exactly where you are at and I praise God and this site...I know what you mean when you say you could feel the caring through the computer.
I am so glad you came here today and let us know how you are doing...bless you and much love.

lillyrose

 

Alisa,
I am fairly new the forum and I agree its a miserable disease. But think about all of what you are really saying before you do anything that you cant take back... Do you have children??? Do you have family???? Think of those people that love you --- Life is not fair but it can be good and meaningful even with this crazy dibilitating disease. We care about you and your life. Please let us know how you are doing.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Paige

 

Alisa I'm so glad you woke up this morning feeling lots better, as Danny has already told you, that's what friends are for, - hang in there and one day you'll be the support for somebody else that's having a rough go of it.. Still sending out prayers and strong healing thoughts for you
Loretta

 

Allisa,
my thought and prayers are with you to keep your spirit up. . We all now how hopeless you felt that night- we've all been there. . .but your family loves you so much. . .don't give up. Where are you from?
-M

 

sending you big hug and many prayers