Family members have rejected me

Discussion in 'Your Living Room' started by sparrow, Nov 17, 2006.

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  1. Motor City Spinner

    Motor City Spinner New Member

    Sparrow,
    God bless you through Jesus Christ. There is a reason for this it will come clear to you one day. I live in Michigan near Detroit and I would love to have coffee or take you to lunch, no one should ever be treated like that from their family. I know exactly how you feel I thoought I had the worst. I have three sisters and not one helped me in my time of need that was so painful for me. I have come through it now with a clear undrstanding. I had to see that they were different then me, that was my lesson, they do not feel the same way.Now I have strength and see them for what they really are, very messed up people, ha ha. Turn to someonelse forget them for now, focus on your legal matters and find someone to talk to, it really does help.
    God Bless You Sparrow,
    Laurie
     
  2. sparrow

    sparrow Guest

    I cried when I read your posts, thank you, all of you !!! :'( :'( :'( :'( I can't say anymore right now, heading back to bed.

    Sparrow :'(
     
  3. LisaB

    LisaB New Member

    Hi Sparrow, I agree, you can't choose your family. My sister has changed a lot as things have not gone well for her in life, and it's hard to deal with. But it is no reflection on you. I agree with others that you should ask your attorney about signing over the deed......if it was done under false premises then maybe you have some ground, I don't know. If you challenge it remember your sister will also have to pay an attorney to deal with it, maybe it would be cheaper for her to make a cash settlement on you if she stands to lose property. Ask your attorney. Sometimes if you have a valid case it can settle out of court if it is cheaper for the opposing party to fight. Good luck. Also, even if you're not religious, I'm not sure about your practices, many churches in our area have resources to help those that need them, even if they are not part of that congregation. They do it as a community resource, often many taking different roles in the community. They could be a great resource to you for getting help, and know of sources of help to prevent homelessness from happening. One thing is, they sure try, at least my church does. They can put you in touch with places that are set up to help. Just a thought. Tons of hugs, Lisa :)
     
  4. Linda1002

    Linda1002 New Member

    Sparrow - My heart goes out to you. I don't think you live in CA, but if you did, you would be welcome to enjoy Thanksgiving with me. I hope and pray you find the resources you need to help you.
     
  5. Daize

    Daize New Member

    [​IMG]


    Dear Sparrow....After reading your post that is so sad. This is just for you. May God watch over you,
    be with you, and guide you every moment. Blessings to you for the gentle, nice person you are.


    Take Care

    Ruth > Daize
     
  6. notgivingup

    notgivingup New Member

    Sparrow.......

    So sorry to hear of this.......how horrible of your family to treat you like this........
    What goes around, come's around. Someday they will be sorry, people like that never stop to think that some day they will need help. GRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!
    I send prayer's and hug's, things will soon turn around for you. If there is anything I can do, please let me know...... Do not give up......
    :-* :-* :-* :-*
    Janet
     
  7. phillyloobird

    phillyloobird New Member

    Sparrow, you have my prayers. If you lived in Texas you could come have Turkey Day with me too.

    Just remember - take each day as it comes and thank God for each one!
     
  8. GinaMc

    GinaMc Me and my friend Sally :)

    Sparrow... words are not enough to say how sorry I am to hear about your family acting this way. My heart truly bleeds for you as you are the most caring person and so willing to help others.... especially me thru all of this. You don't deserve this and you have "us" as your family now .... all of us care so very much about everyone on this board that you start to feel like they are as close as family... I wish you were close to Upper Michigan as an offer from me and my family would be there for you to join us over the Holidays as well... I am sorry that you have to deal with this at this time but I want you to know that if you ever want/need to talk, just IM me and I will give you my phone # and you can call me or vice versa because it is long distance.... just know that you have friends you can lean on at ANY time.

    You have done so much for me.... all your thoughtful posts and encouragement during my recent surgery and now my recovery will NEVER be forgotten. Thank you for that.... you along with others is the reason I am still sane right now... please remember that.

    I know this is hard... and nobody can even imagine what you are going through but you are a wonderful person and everything will work out. Please IM me if you want to talk... I will always be there for you.

    Take care.... sending you tons of hugs... and it's my turn to light that candle for you.. please look for it tonight. You are very special and I will be thinking of you.

    Gina
     
  9. rek83

    rek83 VanGogh had menieres. Maybe he painted what he saw

    I'm so sorry about what is happening with you. Your family should be taking you in and helping you, not leaving you cold... so many people don't understand that depression and MM are not just mere "complaining".... they are REAL problems and they get in the way of everything. I hope things work out. Here is a BIG hug from me :)))
     
  10. Chewy

    Chewy New Member

    Hi, You are in my thoughts and prayers and I hope things turn around for you soon. Donna
     
  11. oaktree8

    oaktree8 New Member

    Sparrow,
    I'm so sorry you're going through such a hard time right now. I'm sending you my positive thoughts and I'll keep you in my prayers. I've learned so much from you, I'm glad you're here, and I join everyone in saying we'll be your family!
     
  12. Amethyst

    Amethyst She believed she could, so she did.

    Sparrow, I'm finding it so hard to come up with encouraging words for you - it's just so awful what your family has done....bloody despictable. I hope you fight them all the way. This family here won't hurt you so please lean on us for strength. I know how judgemental blood relatives can be - that's why the family you choose is the very best type of family.

    Thinking of you.
    Amethyst
     
  13. Peanut Brittle

    Peanut Brittle My Twerple Has My Heart

    Sparrow,

    Maya Angelou says, "We make family as we make friends." SO YOU HAVE A HUGE FAMILY here! What state do you live in? Are you near a college or university that has a womens' group and other services for women?

    Can you get your name on a waiting list for subsidized housing? Some areas have LONG waiting lists, so the sooner you can get on one, the better. And then, you can always say, "No thank you," if you're settled by the time your name comes up.

    I will hold you in my heart, my thoughts, and my prayers.

    Massive hugs,
    Jenn
     
  14. sparrow

    sparrow Guest

    Thank you, all of you for responding to my post and pouring out your support and care. I cry everytime I read your posts because they are soo meaningful to me :'( :'(

    (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((group hugs)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

    Sparrow
     
  15. oaktree8

    oaktree8 New Member

    Sparrow,

    I was thinking about your situation--have you thought trying mediation with your family members? I have a friend who volunteers as a community mediator, and I believe it's a service available in most places, sometimes free--anyway, just a thought--
     
  16. Leon

    Leon New Member

    Sparrow,
    Know that you are in my prayers. Others have asked if you live close to any of us and have offered to help you for Thanksgiving. I hope you can be with some one close to your city. Please keep us posted. I can't add anything new to what has been said alredy.
    Leon
     
  17. rev

    rev New Member

    Sparrow,
    I know it hurts to suffer through this and be let down by the folks we thought we could truly count on. Can't say I'm officially alienated from mine, but they accepted an invitation to another relative's home for Thanksgiving - with me loudly declaring the whole time that I could not do it. Now, I'm a heel for not going. Guess they would rather spend time with a cousin than a brother. We can have sandwiches later - so my family gets leftover sandwiches instead of a family meal. So, I relate!!
    Guess none of us really knows the depth of family & friends until it undergoes a testing time. Hopefully, all of our families will realize (sometime!) the depth and reality of this disease. Then we can know that blood really is thicker than water. Too many of us have experienced this!

    At least we all have each other!
    Blessings & prayers
    rev
     
  18. BarbaraA

    BarbaraA New Member

    There really is not much left to say. I wish you many blessings and good wishes. You know who your family is.
    Barbara
     
  19. nadin

    nadin New Member

    Sparrow

    I feel for you. I have know connection with my family as well, although different circumstances it hurts all the same. I was written off by my brothers and father when my mother past away. It hurts all I can say is hugs lots and lots of hugs! :'(

    Deleah
     
  20. sparrow

    sparrow Guest

    Thank you all for your wonderful posts and very supportive and encouraging words.

    I wanted to update you all on recent developments. I lost my legal battle with my sisters over my mothers estate on Saturday and I have been in bed crying into my pillow over the past two days. I could not afford the $75K fee the litigator I hired to continue in court to defend my rights. There was alot of money involved and so both my sisters walked away with all the family heirlooms and my mothers money. Included in the family heirlooms were all my childhood furniture and possessions, art work, etc which I will never see again, big loss there too. Yes, the Will included us all equally, but one of my sisters who is the Executor committed fraud and both sisters divided out all of my mothers estate between themselves before they advised me of the death of my mother. To call this to the attention of the Executor of Accounts in the county my mother passed away in would have put my sisters in jail and I didn't want to hold them accountable by incarceration either. But they held out (they suffer from sociopathic behaviors - no feelings, no fear, no guilt) and I lost out.

    Also, during that time of my mothers passing, I had declared BK. Now the new BK laws require that any inheritance received within 120 days of filing for BK, all creditors have to be paid back. So, I was forced to come forward, retain a new attorney and I have been battling this issue since January 2005. What I wanted was to convert to Chapter 13 because 1) I wanted to be able to show future creditors that I paid all my creditors back and the judges on the Federal level refused my right to convert, so I am stuck with Chapter 7, 2) With Chapter 7 I have no protection for the next 10 years in the event I have to file to protect any remaining assets, but Chapter 13 allows for relief within 3 years. Also Chapter 13 is less harsh than Chapter 7 on your credit report. I will be going to court in December with checks in hand to pay all my creditors back which is 3/4 of my inheritance and that money I need to live upon. My credit report will show Chapter 7 for the next 10 or more years and will not reflect that I paid all my creditors back.

    With the loss of this battle, I will face homelessness in 2 years because I do not qualify for my county housing project due to the low income I receive from SSD. I had hoped that with Chapter 13, I could apply for a mortgage and purchase a modest condo right away, but since I was denied this avenue, I have to wait 2 more years to apply and I will have gone thru the rest of my inheritance by then.

    Big sigh.

    I still do have two more options to exercise and that is a potential lawsuit over this mold and my health and a wrongful termination by my last employer. I don't know if I want anymore involvement with attorney's. They sucked the life out of me, both financially and emotionally.

    Soooooooooo, that's the long and short of the mess I have been involved in. In the middle of December my sister will close on my mothers home and she will own it free and clear. I had, as you know, asked her if she could add an addition to mom's home for me to live there to keep me out of homelessness and she refused. She has the big home in her countryclub estate on a lake, beautiful house. My other sister owns numerous rental properties and she refused to help me out there as well. I think not only was my loss of the last two legal actions but it was the snubbing of my sisters in the face of my homelessness that stung the worst. That cut deep, very deep.

    I really need my health back so that I can take care of myself because I don't want to become homeless. Timing has not been in my favor laterly. I don't think I could survive homelessness. Everynight I lay my head on my pillow I know it will be just a matter of time before I will loose everything and have to walk away from all my comforts in life. What a future to look forward to.

    Sparrow :'(
     

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