Do we suffer needlessly

Burd is truly an inspiration and a beautiful soul, I hang on her every word when it comes to investigating mav a well.

Gert: the way you feel about Burd is the way many feel about you, myself included, you offer soo much and ask for so little. Please enjoy your weekend and time on the water if you get he chance.

I must say I woke up this morning and read one of the most inspiring threads I have ever read on the forum---- from Who Me.
Hat an inspiration to so many, I wish he would come on and tell his whole story to be a positive force for those hurting. It looks like a man who was once deaf can now hear, has no balance and runs a suscessfull company, his own, if that is no inspirational, nothing is.

Please everybody have a nice weekend, I am sweating my ass off down on south fla. If not for my love of fishing and the Miami dolphins, I would never come back. I am selling my house after this summer if anyone wants it!!!!

 

Didn't you get a fix recently? Did it work for you?

 

Not surprisingly Terry, I see the things you are referring to and feel as you do. Your observations are ones that I share. And I know they come from a caring heart. That is why you burn out, because you try so hard to help others. You are not an unfeeling person who merely passes on information and moves along. You stick around to follow through, to nurture, to aid in the ways you can. When the information you try to share is undermined, or if you feel others will benefit from your information that they are not heeding; of course you will become emotional about it, of course you will become frustrated. And of course at some point you will burn out and need to take a break. Those are normal emotions for a caring and compassionate person.

You and I have formed a close friendship both with one another and also with Diane as a result of this forum. I think of you two as sisters; and I know you feel the same about me. And along the way, we have met some other really great people, as well. That doesn’t negate the fact that I still miss the great people of the past that used to frequent this forum. And I know the same is true of others – they have met people here that they will treasure always and they wonder what has happened to the ones that have left without a trace.

This forum has not simply been a learning experience for many of us – an opportunity to take information from others, learn from that information and then move on. For many of us, this place has been where people gather who are more like family to us than our own biological ones. So we come back here - those that have found our answers, and those who are still seeking – because we love one another and we want to give back to the forum that brought us help, hope and these unique and varied friendships.

And when you are here among your family and friends, for that is how we view one another, and people we care about move on – not because they were helped, but because they were chased away by the arguing and dissension that does occur here - the entire family will feel the effects. That’s normal family dynamics. It is only a cool and distant person who will not be affected by any strife that exists here; by the loss of members who were naturally repelled by the strife. And that’s not you, Terry. You are a compassionate person.

I genuinely treasure and value the people of this forum. They do more than lend support. They make me laugh and they make me cry. They make me angry and they make me sing for joy. I am not going to apologize for having that range of emotions – in my personal life and at this forum or anywhere else where friends and family gather. And neither should you. We are human; we are supposed to celebrate with those that get well; be angry with those that denigrate, argue and accuse; and cry with those that suffer. That is the essence of a successful support forum – that it has an effect on your life and on your emotions as your family and friends do.

Sermon over, dear Terry. (Well, it IS Sunday!)

 

Prima Donna,
What a lovely observation of the forum and the dynamics and people who are here and who used to be here.. Your words were just lovely and so on point.......I have not been here nearly as long as you and Terry and so many others, but I cherish all the support and information this forum has offered me up thru the past several years......... Thank you for putting into words what I too feel on so many levels, today my brain fog would not allow me to come up with such a spot on representation of what this forum is all about and about all the people who make it what it is...
Just wanted to say thank you..........
Leanne

 

Duncan:

I dd get a fix, it worked, should have done it sooner. Suffered sooo long for no reason!!!!!

 

I'm very happy for you. I'll go that route if the time comes without a doubt. For now, the anti-virals seem to be helping me.

 

Great news, if anti virals work, keep at it...

Bee good

 

I want to thank those with their kind words. You represent what is good here. I wasn't looking for special attention and I hope it didn't come across that way, I just felt impelled to let Bulldogs know why many of the old-timers have left or limit their time here, being that I am an old-timer and fall into that category, and too, my sentiment matches many others that have left or rarely visit.

"People generally find what they look for... If you look for trouble there is that too. If you look for peaceful people, there is an abundance." Not me in my 7 years here. I never look for trouble, actually I prefer to skirt around it and I have stayed out of it many, many times when possible, and try to focus on what is good. And most of those that have left that I have been in contact with have never looked for trouble either. Trouble comes and goes, it is human, yet sometimes it sticks around and contaminates and pollutes the whole place and changes things and affects us when we don't want it to, because as Donna expressed so well, we have an attachment to the forum and to so many here that have become friends. If we have a heart for this place and our friends, then we can't help but be affected. Very well expressed Donna.

"I am not one of those who bemoans the way we were or who used to be here. I embrace what is and who is here right now. Every time new people have joined, they have generally had good things to offer." I'm not bemoaning either. When friends leave, especially for unpleasant reasons and not because they are living life to the full, that is not a good thing and it chips away at the heart of the place. New ones, good people, come in, and that is a positive thing for sure, I agree.

There are many good people here. And new ones that don't know what it was like before or hadn't experienced the damage so have nothing to measure with what it is now. I am hopeful they can bring new life into this place. May they be wary of the dangers that exist from those with unhealthy motives that inevitably infect places where large numbers gather.

I don't intend to disappear, but I can't make myself feel for this place like I use to. It isn't because I haven't tried. I am not a pessimist. As long as the messages are heard, and people continue to find help, in the end that is what matters most.

Bulldogs, I am glad for you that you found your answers and relief. Your desire for others to find relief and improve quality of life again is gracious. And that road has many paths. May others be successful in finding the right path for them too.

 

I don't intend to disappear, but I can't make myself feel for this place like I use to. It isn't because I haven't tried. I am not a pessimist. As long as the messages are heard, and people continue to find help, in the end that is what matters most.


I agree Terry, .org lost a little of it's soul for me last winter with all the acrimony, but that was then and this is now. I'm glad that 'era' is in the past. The only constant is change and I've seen the site go through a few of them. There is a lot of good that has been done here over the years and there is a lot of good that continues to be done.

For me personally, having a pretty stout dose of MM and having 20+ years of experience dealing with it, I like to think I can pass some of that experience on and maybe help some people who are new (or newer) or whatever. I can't think of a good reason not to. I also like the camaraderie and support I have gotten here over the years. This place is probably my #1 place to get support and you guys have carried me through many a bad time. Knowing there are others that 'get it' has been invaluable to me. I only wish this had been here in the late 80's when I got diagnosed.

FWIW - Dr. Brackmann at House Ear told me years ago that he had done bilat VNS surgeries on people and considered it a valid (if somewhat drastic) thing to consider.

 

Nothing is like it used to be for me. That's because I am older. When I find out whose fault that is, there's going to be hell to pay!